I Doubt It

Today all I can see is every dream that never came true
Every time I screamed out and never heard from You
Every loose end that never got tied
Every time I felt alone as I cried.

Today all I hear are the sneers of those mocking my faith
The repetition of questions never being set straight.
The deafening silence when I wait for You to make a move
The countless reasons to give up my faith til it’s proved.

Yet, my heart keeps calling out for You.

Worldly Affair, Heavenly Commitment

“I had this secret affair,” she said. “He loved me more than anyone could.

He bore his heart to me, brought his cares to me and listened equally as good.

The best of friends we quickly became

Our souls finding familiar comfort while passion filled the same.

But he had committed himself to another a long time ago.

He was not free to love me openly or so the story would go.”

So their commitment sat in silence, in a world all on it’s own

He would keep on loving her as long as he didn’t have to let the other go.

She cried out to the Lord in her desperation and pain

“Why give me this love that must stay hidden and contained?

Shouldn’t his love for me make it impossible to hide

Impossible to still hold onto another and in his closest companions not confide?”

And the Lord answered her: “Now I will ask the same question of you

Has your commitment to the world kept you silent of our love, too?

You walk with me each day, have come to know me and love me like no other

Yet keep me hidden from your world, contained as a secret lover.

Denounce your prior affinities, do not be ashamed

The intimacy we have grown by heart, now walk in the same.

Share our love story, no longer make me hide.

Let your faith in me match internally what is seen on the outside.”

“And I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness. Then you will know the Lord.” Hosea 2:20

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.  This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.” Ephesians 5:31-32

Inevitable Pondering

Reaching for answers that aren’t there
Wondering if my wishes will vanish with the wind
Trying to make sense of the madness around me
Wondering what picture I fit in

Trying to grab hold of pleasures that pass me
To celebrate love and warm hearts
Distracted by horror stories, fears and theories
Unable to decide how true they all are

Building strength to stand on my convictions
With limited info to decide what those should be
Working day to day just to earn a living
Wondering if this is all that will become of me

At what point in time will the big picture be clear
When will we know what we chose to believe was right
I guess not until the ever after
So we keep saying our prayers every night

He Has Overcome the World

I can’t guarantee any outcome for tomorrow
Or even my breaths beyond today
But I can rest in the grace of my Savior
No matter how far I have fallen or strayed.

I can’t make my troubles on earth get better
But I can rejoice in heavenly truths
I can’t remove all fear or failures
But I can find real joy and peace in You

“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 13 But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.” 1 Peter 4:12-13

Firm Foundation

I’ll keep reminding myself
To place my hope in You
Not in another, not in a circumstance
Not in flashes of temporary hope before me
Nor memories of victories past
No, only in You
Will I hope and rely
On the Rock of Your truth and promises
Will I place each brick of my life.

“It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against that house, it stands firm because it is well built.” Luke 6:48